honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
