at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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