3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
