Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize