You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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