Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
