I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You smell like stripper and shame
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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