bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
