So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize