I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
