i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
