I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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