Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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