I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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