evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize