I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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