So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
