If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
