Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
