I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
