Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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