My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize
