I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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