I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
