I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
40s are totally the cure
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
How does one acquire holy water?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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