I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
