There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
