i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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