I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
