There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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