can we get nightvision for the apartment?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
