Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
