She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
