Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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