You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
