Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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