i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's blow job season.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize