How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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