Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
