Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
