good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
