I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
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