Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize