brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize