...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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