Yo dont text me then not text me
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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