if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
