This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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