And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
