1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
