I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize