i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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